Wow... how the time's gone, eh? Where have I been? Why those regular and frequent posts and then nothing for three weeks? Well, dedicated readers, I owe an apology to you all... both of you should know that I'm very sorry.

In short, the last few weeks have been pretty crazy. School's winding down, and kids are winding up. There's regular life stuff on top of that. Most importantly, though, and the real reason for my absence, is the fact that someone very dear to me passed away a week ago Friday. My grandmother on my mother's side, who was fine, even just those few weeks ago, is now gone. I had something very long written up, with an account of her condition over her last couple of weeks, and how I dealt with it. However, it was long, and really personal, so I decided to save it for myself. I'll also not put her picture up, as I'd planned. Just know that she was a beautiful lady, 89 years old, who played the fiddle and lived the cleanest and most humble life. She'd never complain, and would always help anyone out. She really was (is) a pillar of our family and her home community. She was a quiet pillar of strength and all that was right in the world, and an example of the good in people that seems to be going away.

So, instead of my write-up, I'll leave you with something short and simple, with a somewhat-appropriate lyric from a currently-fave song:


my parents and us there
it was so quiet, so peaceful, so natural
with shorter gurgled breaths
until one last small one
like she was already gone and her body just slowed down
until it unabruptly stopped
like a clock that keeps losing time until it forever pauses
like any other living thing
it was such a natural end to life

I played with my 3-year-old niece that evening
she showed me the marigolds she planted in her own little bed that day
there were painted snailshells in it that a friend gave to her
she was full of life and joy
although she pretended that our imaginary person we'd visit was sick and may die
she brought them medicine (blueberry punch) and it made them all better
such an innocent, lovely, natural start to her life
sunshine in her hair and a future in her eyes she can't see
that will eventually have a natural end

It was as if I saw the whole cycle of life within a matter of hours

"Now I’m down I’m just hanging on the corner
I can’t help but reminisce
When you’re gone all the colors fade
When you’re gone no New Year’s Day parade
You’re gone
Colors seem to fade"
- Amos Lee